Purpose...the reason for being.
If you look back at my first post (eight years ago, yikes!), the purpose of starting this blog was twofold: to record my child's milestones (he was about five months old at the time) and to discuss and sometimes vent about motherhood.
Now that my son is eight years old and I have not recorded ANY of his milestones (I'm a terrible mother), plus I have two more kids whose milestones are also not recorded (!!), you might call me a failure. Well, maybe I'm the only one who calls myself that. I mean, I would probably never call someone else a failure, so maybe nobody else would call me that either. But, yes, I have failed at my original concept. At this point, though, there is no sense in dwelling on the past and what I DIDN'T accomplish. It's time to focus on moving forward.
Here I am stating the NEW purpose of my blog:
A Place 4 My Head
Makes sense, right? I mean, I titled my blog "A Place 4 My Head" for a reason. Sure, my previous love for Linkin Park had something to do with it, but beyond that I think my idea for this was always to express what was on my mind. It just happened to be that my mind was constantly on being a new mom.
Now, with over eight years of motherhood under my belt and my youngest finally out of diapers (thank God!), I'm much less concerned with all of the baby milestones, unsolicited advice, nursing struggles, lack of sleep, etc. I've been home with my children with my full-time job being "mom" for long enough to realize that I've lost a bit of myself. A LOT of myself, actually. I'm at a point in my life where I want to get back to me, to who I used to be before motherhood took over, and also to who I WANT to be. Soon all of my kids will be in school all day; where will I be? How will I be spending those eight hours of solitude?
WHAT IS MY PURPOSE?
I'm hoping to use this blog as a path to discovery and realizations. I don't know what my purpose is, but I do know the purpose of this blog is therapy. I can't pinpoint a specific theme or topic, there won't be a central focus like food or fashion or lifestyle tips or music or art. Maybe that's not a good way to gain followers or maintain an audience, but, at this point, I'm writing for myself. I have so much going on in my brain, so many ideas (both brilliant and banal), that I need an outlet. I need to get them all out in "print." I need to connect with words and the page the way that I used to. I truly think my happiness depends on it.
Thanks for "listening."
